Monday, April 23, 2012

The long road...

My whole spiritual existence in my 29 years could be summed up in a few words... "I don't know.'" And I didn't. My earliest experiences with religion involved a neighbor taking me to church when I was 5 or 6. I couldn't tell you the denomination, but I can tell you my mother was concerned when her god fearing 5 year old came home preaching that she was going to hell because she didn't go to church.

All of a sudden we were all going to a Unitarian Church, and I was receiving a Sunday School education in many different religions, including Christianity. I don't remember it very well, but I recall that the church trips to Mexico & Northern AZ were fun. I also think that I had trouble connecting with the kids in my class, but I don't remember why.

From there, I went where my mom did, right on over to paganism. Of course, I lagged behind her a few years, and I think most of my dabbling was driven out of wanting to feel closer to her after she left. Turns out, while she was away, she ditched religion all together, and now classifies herself as an Atheist.

After awhile, I just became ambivalent-- agnostic, or whatever you want to call it. I just didn't care, didn't really think about my spirituality except for a moment here or there, and I never let the small nudges really slow me down. I never picked up the bible. Never found a church.

These nudges have become more frequent over the last year, when finally we got a nudge in the form of a shove all the way from AZ to SC. You think that would finally convince me, but it didn't. It took living for a whole month with a plague filled house, fighting with my husband, and struggling, for me to finally hear the voice. What did I hear?

It was something along the lines of, "sure, you can probably get by ok with out me, but if you really want to thrive in this life, you are going to have to let me help."

Errrr. Wtf? Who just said that? Great, my sinus infection is making me lose my mind.

Except I immediately recognized that it was something more. Something I always claimed I needed if He expected me to become a believer. Proof. A sign. Talk to me! Tell me! I almost begged empty rooms to be filled with the faith that so many people just take for granted. I always wanted to believe, but I couldn't do it blindly, and I couldn't do it just because it seemed to bring other people comfort. Maybe I wasn't listening carefully enough, or maybe He didn't reach out until I would be receptive. Perhaps this earache is really Him, beating on my eardrums to PAY ATTENTION! I finally heard, and I already feel lighter at heart.

Next steps? Find a bible. Find a church. Write about it. Try not to care that my mom is probably rolling her eyes so bad it hurts. Do we ever stop caring what our parents think? Do we ever stop trying to please them? I guess I finally just realized that I should probably focus on pleasing someone else.Can someone just pick up the bible and start reading it without spending years sitting in a church? Will I "get it?" I feel like I'm at the edge of a cliff, about to jump into the vast unknown without my floaties on. What the heck, here goes!

Saturday, April 14, 2012


This year we had our very first Easter Egg Hunt for the boys! Fun was had by all, and we've all been nomming on candy ever since then! {thank goodness we are almost out!} Can you believe how gorgeous spring is in SC?

Friday, April 6, 2012

Freakin' GREAT Friday! (and a recap)

Today turned from potentially cool to simply awesome. It was a great way to finish off this change in our routine with me going back to work two weeks ago. So, today, I offer you the awesomeness that occurred, as well as a recap of the last two weeks.

First, super coolness, deluxe style, involved Josh FINALLY getting his very own brand new "hiccup truck." Well, that is what Mikey calls it, anway. In reality it is a 2001 Chevy Silverado, with 8 cylinders and plenty of power to take my boxes of crap to goodwill. Sold! She doesn't have a name yet, but Hiccup does sound really catchy. Here she is!

Just beyond the truck is a completely new concept for desert dwellers like me. I mean, I was getting all geeked out for Fall, but it didn't occur to me that Spring would be so fantastic. The view from our back porch went from this:

To this:

I know they call this place Greenville, but seriously, this place got GREEN!

In fact, our whole neighborhood blew up in an amazing display of springtime glory, but even our yard was pretty impressive (if you ignored the insane overgrowth):

{Japanese Maple + White Dogwood + Red Dogwood}

 {The pretty yellow flowers... Iris's I believe!}
 {More Dogwood}
 {And still, more Dogwood + Japanese Maple}
 {The tree line over the roof of our home... amazing!}
 {Our Dogwood and Japanese Maple, from the front}
{the view from our front yard looking down the street - can't believe how lush and alive everything is}

Besides staring at our Front yard, and everyone getting ill, I baked cookies:

And drank water:

And took care of sick babies:

And still more sick babies:

Omg, someone get the babies something to put them out of their misery!

Oh, and I can't forget all the laundry I did in my state of the art "Laundry Facility," conveniently located outside of my home in the wasp/bee infested garage. Love it.

And then Good Friday rolled around, and it was all good.

There is something great about getting off work early on a Friday, especially when that Friday is a holiday. Ma-in-law was watching the baybay's at our house, so instead of rushing to pick them up from daycare, I rushed to Publix and ordered myself a sandwich from their deli. Their sandwiches are usually rediculously good, but today I had to wait 20 minutes, and that somehow diminished the taste. I guess everyone had the same idea as me to get a sandwich from Publix for lunch.

Anyway, I rolled up our driveway to find Pa-in-law, and another neighbor, Miss Ann, playing in the the flowerbed in our front yard. Last week it looked like this (aka, an overgrown disaster) and it is already looking way more amazing with half the bed cleared of the awful ground cover (as shown above). Tomorrow we are going to get back out in the yard to do some more cleanup work! Can't wait to show you our progress, and to hopefully stay more current on this blog :).

Thursday, April 5, 2012


O.m.g. Life is busy. And insane. Of course the return to daycare equated to an epidemic of the stomach flu (which made its way up the street to Ma & Pa-in-laws house) followed shortly by a nasty cold for all, too. Fortunately that has been somewhat more contained, however, it has led to many lazy nights in front of the TV in lieu of unpacking the rest of our boxes.

Anyway. Despite all that mess, everything is going pretty well. I really like my new job, and I like the people I work with. J still loves his gig, and the boys seem to like their new germ factory (aka, daycare) too.

I will try to get on here this weekend to share some pictures of our yard in bloom, and the boys, and maybe even progress made on the house. Now that this fog is finally lifting from my brain, I'm feeling very ambitious!